How I Shop with Bill Bailey: ‘Could be a life-saver in an apocalypse’

Always wondered what everyday stuff celebrities buy, where they shop for food and the basics they scrimp on? The comedian and musician talks medieval instruments, hiking socks and coffee rituals with the Filter

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Bill Bailey has been entertaining fans for more than four decades as an award-winning comedian and multi-instrumentalist, blending comedy and music in his performances. After cutting his teeth on the 1980s standup circuit, Bailey went on to forge a successful career as a television regular and presenter on shows including Never Mind the Buzzcocks, QI and Bill Bailey’s Australian Adventure; in 2020 he won Strictly Come Dancing.

This autumn and winter he is touring the UK with his live show Vaudevillean.

It literally arrived this morning – a medieval instrument called a psaltery. It’s a bit like a dulcimer or zither, a kind of V shape you hold and pluck. That’s the sort of thing that I buy.

Some of it online, but we’re lucky where we are in west London, with a great greengrocer, butcher, fishmonger, a little Korean store and a Thai shop called Sriracha supermarket, where I can get spices from.

A Gibson Les Paul guitar to my godson. It was brilliant seeing someone really immerse themselves in playing it. I think giving a musical instrument is a great present generally.

That was a guitar as well, from my wife as a birthday present. I was doing a standup residency in the West End, and there was a bit in the show where I would pick up an electric guitar and start playing it. Unbeknown to me, in the interval, she colluded with the crew to switch the standard guitar for a rare vintage white Gibson. I went [to pick it up] in the second half and thought: “Wait, what’s this?” Then I noticed there was a bow tied around the neck. I was completely overwhelmed; it was a brilliant way to have it delivered. It almost completely derailed the gig.

A music store called Thomann. They sell all kinds of interesting instruments, but also accessories, guitar leads and all the extra stuff you need when you’re playing or writing music at home.

I buy a lot of outdoor stuff – boots, camping equipment – from Cotswold Outdoor in Kensington. I recently bought a LifeStraw, which apparently you can stick in almost any water source and it will filter it into drinking water. I haven’t tested it in rivers, but it might be a life-saver in an apocalypse.

A Chemex coffee system, a simple glass flask and filters. It makes the best-tasting coffee.

It was a semi-computerised accordion. It weighed an absolute ton, so it was impractical to play on stage because I could only hold it for very short periods, and it was festooned with cables and things trailing from it. In the end, it sat in the cupboard and gathered dust until I bought a much lighter one.

Big hiking socks – I do a lot of walking, so you work your way through them.

The last lot I bought was from TK Maxx – a bargain.

£20: I would probably buy a multipack of socks. For £200, art materials for my dad because he paints a lot and brushes, oils, acrylics and paper are not cheap – we go to Chiswick Arts & Crafts.

I don’t have one, but I buy secondhand furniture from eBay.

A Turkish saz, a long-necked lute. I love those instruments that, on the face of it, seem pretty simple and limited, but then you get to know them, and you realise you can play all kinds of things.

Day to day, I love a decent coffee. It’s become something of a ritual.

I bought a little Krups coffee grinder a few years ago, which I use with the Chemex.

I drink more coffee, so probably teabags. I get a big multipack from the Co-op or cash-and-carry, because we have lots of people coming around all the time; you can’t be too precious about the teabags in our house.

Bill Bailey’s Vaudevillean is touring from 5 November to 13 December, then will be at the Theatre Royal Haymarket from 16 December 2026 to 6 February 2027. Tickets are on sale now

For more, read How I Shop with Tom Daley and Jonathan Van Ness

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