Characteristics of intergenerational worship: flexibility

Flexibility in the context of worship

In the context of intergenerational worship, flexibility is about making room for each person’s humanity. Researchers and practitioners emphasize flexibility in a variety of ways: John Roberto describes a “welcoming environment of hospitalitytrust, acceptanceemotional safety and care” (“A permanent faith“). Joe Azzopardi and Kayle de Waal emphasize “accommodation» as essential to thriving intergenerational ministry (“The Generating Church“). Holly Allen Catterton and Jason Brian Santos use the same word, “accommodation”, to describe how intergenerational communities adapt to the needs of different generations (“Intergenerational Ministry – A Forty Year Perspective: 1980-2020“). Michelle Clifton-Soderstrom and David Bjorlin take a theological approach in their discussion of “make room for each other“, discussing how the Greek word for the three persons of the Trinity, “perichoresis”, includes the Greek word for “mak[ing] bedroom” (“Including children in worship“).

Although some may view flexibility in worship as too informal, it is more of a posture of grace than an informal posture. Should we normalize the need for some worshipers to leave the sanctuary, take care of their bodies, and then return? How do we respond to liturgical missteps (like spilled wine, a lector forgetting their turn, etc.)? How can we accommodate worshipers who are unable to remain seated or silent for the duration of the service, recognizing that many people, from toddlers to neurodivergent or pregnant people, may need to vocalize or move around?

At its core, flexibility recognizes that a worship community is made up of bodies with different needs and offers grace. Flexibility does not necessarily mean that all behaviors are acceptable; instead, he offers clear and reasonable expectations and responds with patience rather than rigidity or annoyance.

A broader vision of respect

In 2019, I completed an independent study on intergenerational worship while completing my Master of Divinity at Virginia Theological Seminary. As part of this course, I visited various congregations practicing intergenerational worship and looked for commonalities across contexts. While I wrote about six common characteristics in my final article (and about Building Faith in “Vibrant worship for all ages“), I noticed a seventh commonality that I wasn’t sure how to interpret: In settings where intergenerational worship was most vibrant, people drank coffee. Well, it might have been tea, but they had cups and tumblers anyway. I asked one of my mentors, the Rev. Miranda Hassett, about this observation, and she led me to consider expanding my view of “reverence.”

For some, it is respectful to refrain from eating and drinking in a sanctuary – or at least during worship. For others, the possibility of sipping a hot drink and offering their child a snack makes the church a true place of welcome, comfort and belonging. As Miranda asked me many years ago, what if part of what people wanted from church – and especially worship – was to “arrive safely home,” as the hymn “Come, Thou art the source of every blessing” (“The Hymnal 1982,” ‎#686) says?

Much like intergenerational worship, reverence is not “one size fits all.” We each have our own relationship to the divine and, therefore, our own relationship to respect. When thinking about flexibility in the context of worship, it can be helpful to think about your own view of respect. If you went to church as a child, what did respect mean to you as a child in worship? Has your view of respect changed since your childhood? What attitudes or behaviors seem most respectful to you? The most irreverent? What are the current expectations (explicit or implicit) for reverence in your own worship context? How might respect and flexibility be balanced, or even complementary, in your community’s worship?

Practical steps to increase flexibility

Each church context is unique and there is no single “right” way to practice intergenerational worship. The list of ideas below is not prescriptive (or exhaustive), but is intended to inspire your imagination to help worshipers connect more deeply as members of the body of Christ in a specific worship community.

• Communicating flexibility to liturgical leaders: Church leaders can be flexible when preparing lay leaders for liturgical roles. This can take place during formal worship leader training or as part of prayer with the altar party just before the opening procession. For example, when she co-led intergenerational worship, the Rev. Elizabeth Henry-McKeever reminded each week at the altar that “nothing, nothing, nothing, not even one liturgical misstep can separate you from the love of God.”
• Graceful Errors Pattern: Church leaders can be flexible in how they respond to their own mistakes and those of others. A calm, non-anxious presence and verbal assurance are very helpful. For example, if no one stands to read the Psalm, the president might say, “It looks like we need someone to lead the Psalm this morning. Does anyone agree? Thank you, Wilma.” Or by losing their place in the Eucharistic prayer: “For a moment, I lost my place. Here it is”.
• Normalize the movement: From the need to go to the bathroom to a short attention span or back pain, there are a wide variety of reasons why someone may need to move their body or leave the sanctuary and return during a given liturgy. We can explicitly standardize movements by adding a note in the bulletin, on the website, or in announcements: “Please take care of your body as necessary during worship. You are welcome to leave and return at any time.” Church leaders can also mention their comfort with moving in conversations with anyone who may need reassurance, such as parents of young children.
• Offer clear expectations: Most people feel more comfortable when they know what to expect. When we gather for worship, we come together as people of different generations and religious backgrounds. Naturally, we have different ideas about acceptable behavior during the liturgy. Consider how you might clarify what is and is not welcome during worship. For example, St. George’s in La Canada, California, has a page of their site welcoming neurodiversity which also includes a section titled “What is Not Okay to Do in Church?” »
• Provide tools: Consider what tools might meet the physical, emotional, and spiritual needs of your congregation during worship. For example, a stack of cushions might be available for those who need back support in a church with wooden pews. You could invite worshipers to bring tea or coffee. You could provide sensory resources, such as those recommended by Bird Treacy. Of course, it’s important to know your context.

Do you have another idea for increasing the flexibility of intergenerational worship? Let us know! Contact Sarah Bentley AllredProject Director, Roots & Wings: Intergenerational Training Collaboration.

The image shown is of Hai Nguyen on Unsplash