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Some roles within the Church appear to be filled almost exclusively by women. Is it because women want to fill these roles, or because they believe these are jobs reserved for women?
Even if men take on such roles, they are often seen as special assistants – guest stars whose willingness to participate should be especially lauded.
Is there a “man’s job and a woman’s job” within the Church? With biblical support, this article will explore five of the lies women believe about their role in the Church and a little about how the Church as a whole has perpetuated them.
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1. The Bible says men are superior to women
Let’s start with the root of the lies to follow: the myth that the Bible says men are superior to women. Dr. Erwin W. Lutzer at Moody Media argues Otherwise. “We are equal, as co-heirs Jesus Christ. This equality is reinforced by the liberal and impartial distribution of the spiritual gifts of the Holy Spirit to His children.
Paul teaches the Corinthian Christians that “God gives his gifts as he determines (1 Corinthians 12:1,11). No further distinction is made as to their attribution.
Lutzer goes on to examine the vitality of women’s participation in the early church, from leadership to martyrdom.
Following the example of Christ who involved, respected, and even appointed women who played an integral role in the growth of the Church, Paul frequently mentions women who helped him in his ministry.
Damaris is an examplea lady who knew how to follow what Paul was saying to the intellectuals of the time. “Her freedom to be in public and her ability to follow Paul’s conversation with the leaders allowed her to understand and embrace the gospel taught by Paul. She became one of the new converts to Christianity in the city of Athens.”
Phoebe, a successful businesswoman in the Roman Empire, “used her wealth and influence to grow the Christian Church. She even used a business trip to spread the gospel. But she didn’t just carry one man’s message. Phoebe was a church leader herself” (Ibid.).
Paul benefited from her wealth, status, and dedication to Jesus, and as such, Phoebe inspired new generations of women to realize that there is nothing wrong with a woman being successful.
In fact, his cultic use of power and money was a source of inspiration to men and women of the Church in general.
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2. Women take care of the nursery
Women are often found in the loud, bustling baby or toddler rooms, or in the church classroom where children ages four to twelve learn the Bible. Sunday school teachers often strive to create interesting and enjoyable lessons for their students, not knowing whether three or 23 people will show up that morning.
Society (and even some women) maintain that it is women who take care of children and that daycare is not a place for men. Samuel Emadi believes that sometimes men who train to become pastors “have as their objective only one type of service: public teaching”.
Even when looking for ways to serve in their church, men neglect or avoid nursery and Sunday school.
Yet Jesus reminded us that there is no work too small for a servant of the living God, including rocking babies to sleep and teaching toddlers to share. He made it a point of honor to prioritize respect and care for children.
And, in fact, this work is very significant in establishing the love of Christ in the hearts of children as early as possible. “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to them belongs the kingdom of God» (Mark 10:14). Teaching children is valuable work, but it is not exclusively a woman’s job.
Women seem to have the natural nurturing abilities needed to serve in the nursery: compassion, patience, and tenderness.
But Emadi argues that men, especially those who want to become pastors one day, should probably teach Sunday school or take care of babies. “Spend an hour with 10 two-year-olds every Sunday […] might just be what the Lord uses to make you a more compassionate and faithful church member in the present and a church leader in the future. Nursery service is a great way to learn to love the children in your church.
Seen in this light, perhaps women sometimes need to abandon the nursery precisely because men need their chance to become more like Jesus by serving the smallest members of their church.
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3. Women prepare food
While making a completely different point, Labor 31:9-10 suggests that, at least in his house, women did the cooking. “If I was lured by my neighbor’s wife and waited, hiding outside her door, then let my wife cook another man’s food and sleep in another man’s bed” (GNT).
According to Proverbs 31“An excellent wife “gets up while it is still dark and provides food for her house” (10.14).
But the men also prepared and distributed food according to the Scriptures. Christ did not cook the loaves and fishes, but he multiplied and shared them.
He could have given the baskets to the women, but John 6:11 said: “Jesus then took the loaves, and having given thanks, he distributed them to those who were sitting. And the fish, as much as they wanted.”
It is not clear whether he did it himself or sent his disciples with baskets, but there is no mention of it being a woman’s job.
Genesis 27 describes how Isaac asked his mother to prepare food for Isaac, but Esau also appears to have prepared a meal for his father (Genesis 27). God fed his own people from heaven with manna (Exodus 16).
Traditionally, men are seen as providers, which is not the same as cooks. But there is no commandment in the Bible that says only women serve in the kitchen. The Bible says, however, that if there is work to be done, do it cheerfully.
Women: If you love working in the church kitchen, do it as for Christ. But if you really don’t like cooking, you can step back and let men cook or work alongside them.
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4. Women don’t lead
There are many opportunities to lead in a church, with most taking place Monday through Saturday.
Whether or not you believe that women can or should become pastors, you can agree that a church is in constant need of leaders in various capacities. “Where there is no guidance a people falls, but in the abundance of counselors there is safety” (Proverbs 11:14).
Leadership is a huge duty. Watching over souls may include discipleshipparenting, counseling and teaching. No individual can do everything.
Paul thought women should be silent in church (1 Corinthians 14:35, 1 Timothy 2:12); yet, women taught.
Apollos began preaching in the synagogue, but his theology was not entirely correct. “He began to speak boldly in the synagogue, but when Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they took him aside and explained to him more precisely the way of God” (Acts 18:26).
Romans 16:1-4 exposes the courage of women in the early Church. Phoebe was a “servant” and “patron” of the Church, leading the way in generosity. Prisca and Aquila were “fellow workers in Christ who risked their lives to [Paul’s] life.” They led by example and were praised for their efforts.
Dr. Erwin W. Lutzer notes that “the Bible defines particular roles for each sex” within the Church. This includes serving as “deaconesses, directors of church ministries, and teachers of women and children.”
In other words, some women will be called to lead, and who understands the needs of women in the Church better than others?
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5. Couples and mothers are more valued by Christ
Many congregations seem to expect women to marry, as if a spouse would heal them.
Matt Hodges wrote“Too often in church culture we tend to idolize marriage and downplay singleness. But those who value and steward the gift of singleness remind us that Jesus is enough and nothing else can truly satisfy.”
Hodges talks about the dignity of singleness: it is not necessarily an affliction or a sign of inferiority or emotional problems.
Paul wrote: “To the single and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot control themselves, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion” (1 Corinthians 7:8-9).
When a single Christian woman believes she will sin because she is alone, singleness feels a lot like a curse.
But his celibacy does not change his value in the eyes of Christ; nor should it affect how her church treats her. A single woman can still mentor other women, teach Sunday school, and participate in other areas of ministry.
The Church needs to ask itself: “Should we include single women? Do they feel like they belong?” Look at Bible studies and care groups: are any of them organized around women who share this marital state in common? And does the Church assume that single women only want to be with other unmarried women?
Many men are aware of the pitfalls of stereotypes and want to help change the experience of women in the Church.
Women should be sensitive and grateful to men who are happy to accept jobs that have always gone to women in the past.
Part of the responsibility for changing the discourse falls on Christian women: they must make room for men around the pot or on the toys in the nursery.
Also, while giving men this opportunity, let them take ownership without expecting them to cook or rock like you do. If they serve like Christ, it is a nice result.
To go further:
7 Lies Women Believe About Thanksgiving Hospitality
5 lies women believe about their place in the family
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This article was originally published on Christianity.com. For more faith-building resources, visit Christianity.com.
Originally published on Monday, November 27, 2023.
