According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, apathy is defined as “a lack of feeling or emotion.” It is a “lack of interest or concern” and comes from the Greek brothers and sisters, antipathy, sympathyAnd empathy. Also called numbness or emptiness, it goes deeper than indifference.
Even though I have been an English teacher, I am not here to give you a language lesson. But I’m here to help you understand how and why apathy might be creeping into your life. And not just your daily life, but your spiritual life.
When faith seems flat and calm, we find ourselves praying without emotion. We love, but we feel empty. Maybe even the Scriptures don’t strike us like they used to. We all, even if we don’t like to admit it, experience these moments of numbness. But numbness does not equal infidelity. This does not mean that God has left us, although that is the case. No, numbness is often a signal and not a failure.
If you’re feeling spiritually numb today, you’re in good company. Here are 3 steps to finding God in the midst of these feelings:
1. Stop interpreting numbness as a spiritual failure
The moment we stop “feeling” God, we think we have failed Him. But numbness is often a matter of self-protection, exhaustion, or grief, not a sin.
We are even quick to make assumptions about ourselves:
- “Something is wrong with my faith. »
- “God feels far away because I did something wrong.”
- “I am so exhausted that God is ashamed of my struggles.”
Instead of accepting these assumptions, we need to question and reframe them. Remember: Emotional numbing is often a nervous system response. Our mental health and our spiritual life are linked.
In Psalm 13David, a man after God’s own heart, even felt this:
“How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I struggle with my thoughts and have sorrow in my heart day by day? How long will my enemy triumph over me?” (Psalm 13:1-2NIV).
Psalm 77a psalm by Asaph, a worship leader, writes similar words: “I cried to God for help; I cried to God to hear me. When I was in trouble, I sought the Lord; by night I stretched out untiring hands, and would not be comforted” (Psalm 77:1-2NIV).
But even amidst these feelings of despair, Romans 8:38-39 reminds us: “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any power, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (KJV). Feelings do not equal loyalty.
Instead of ridiculing yourself or asking, “What’s wrong with me?” ”, try asking nicely: “What can I carry?” » Present these requests to the Lord in prayer and ask Him to help you see this situation clearly. Remember: Feelings are not the enemy, but they can be powerful indicators of what is happening in our lives.
2. Seek God in presence, without feeling
Unfortunately, in the world we live in, God’s presence is often measured by emotion (even though it shouldn’t be). Modern Christianity has become Really good at overvaluing feelings. But Job, Elijah, and Jesus teach us that feelings do not equate to the presence of God.
Job lost everything, but God was still with him. Elijah felt alone and wanted to die, but God was always with him. Jesus cried tears of anguish in the garden of Gethsemane, but God allowed his crucifixion to happen because he knew what was on the other side. It is tempting to equate the presence of God with feeling. Goosebumps and screams of the Holy Spirit, just to name a few. But faith can be both calm and real. Not everyone has to, or even wants, to be an outgoing Christian, and that’s okay. Author Nathalie Hilton describes it like this:
“Our faith in God must be bold, but that doesn’t necessarily mean strong. Quiet moments of faith are just as important as the ones we see.”
This week, instead of judging yourself based on how you feel, try a low-pressure practice:
- Sit down with a verse and read it slowly. Don’t force insight or emotion, but stick with it. Then anchor yourself in the truth he proclaims.
- Ask God to reveal himself to you. Don’t be surprised if it’s a small whisper or silence. God’s presence is not always loud or showy.
- Tell God that you want to feel His presence, but that you are open to how He may speak to you. Remember: God can be present without being noisy. And its presence can be found, even in the absence of feeling.
3. Reconnect with honest and simple practices
Even as we try to base our relationship with God on feelings, we must remember that depth often comes through honesty, not intensity. God doesn’t want you to pretend to be something you’re not, and He doesn’t expect you to act or feel a certain way when you come to Him.
Instead of attempting a spiritual overhaul, putting yourself down, or maintaining guilt-based routines, try short prayers, name your emotions, breathe, walk, and ground yourself. Do not run away from God; tell him exactly how you feel.
In Psalm 62:1we read these beautiful words of David: “Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him” (KJV). I love this scripture because it reminds me that no matter how I feel, God and His salvation cannot be taken away from me. Matthew 11:28-30 It says this: “Come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (KJV).
My friends, God wants you to come to Him just as you are, even if you are numb and spiritually apathetic. You have nothing to be ashamed of, and He is not ashamed of you. But he asks you to tell him exactly how you feel. To invite him into this space. To honestly open your heart and mind to how His presence might show up, even when feelings are lacking.
You don’t need to collect all the right words or phrases. You don’t need to feel a certain way. You must come to Him. If this is difficult, try saying a simple prayer: “God, I don’t feel much, but I am here. » And no matter how you feel, He is there, and that is enough.
Numb does not mean absent
No matter how you feel today, I want to reassure you: God is not waiting for your feelings to return. Numb seasons do not nullify faith. But they can lead us to a deeper relationship with Him if we run to Him in the midst of these feelings.
The dictionary definition of apathy may not change anytime soon, but God can transform our weak and weary hearts as we run to Him. You don’t need to be afraid, ashamed or hard on yourself, sweet friend. God loves you and is with you even when you are devoid of feelings. Seek his face today.
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Akarawut Lohacharoenvanich
