“God first… God first.” Sometimes I really feel like I’m in a conflict zone, facing an enemy: myself. You may have been in my shoes, tempted not to do what God wants you to work on, because your desire to take up activities like gardening or badminton that pique your interest is just too alluring to pass up. As someone with so many interests, staying focused or engaged in what God has called me to do has not always been a no-brainer, one might say, not without some friction.
Our current world is not conducive to following God’s heart, is it? Our days are often filled with work schedules, personal responsibilities, and hobbies we want to pursue. This is one of the reasons why we sometimes feel completely exhausted, even just to spend quality time with Him or do God-centered work. Compared to previous generations, we have many more distractions that take our attention away from God and the work we must do for Him.
With our new technology, social media and everything else, it’s all too easy to get pulled in all directions. Have you ever been glued to your cell phone for an hour or more? If you’ve ever wanted to accomplish something but ended up disappointing yourself due to a lack of discipline or confidence, even the best of us have moments like this. Perhaps you tried to gain exposure and expand your circle of influence (not for selfish reasons), but ended up backing down for fear of being ridiculed or even ostracized.
Facing the obstacles that prevent you from getting where you want to be can be a herculean task if you’re shy, lonely, and unsure of what you can bring to the table. Whether it is applying for a dream job at a well-established company, migrating to another country, taking on a challenging job, or accomplishing the tasks God has given us, the list goes on.
Speaking of which, I came across this advice from a behavioral therapist on how to achieve everything you care about, somewhat drastic advice. It’s about brainwashing you into the ideal person you aspire to be, helping you radically change your personality, behavior and habits and, in short, becoming someone you are not.
As life coaches often said, “nothing changes as long as you stay the same.” No change happens until you do. So, an overhaul or total overhaul should be initiated if you want to see results that deviate from the norm, results that are somewhat different from your usual, to enable you to achieve your most desired results or whatever is making you feel bad.
Needless to say, my curiosity got the best of me because there is something I need to change about myself; things that hold me back because of doubt and, among other things, that hinder my growth.
However, following these tips would require us to adopt a bold and confident personality, bordering on fearless, self-reliant, untouchable and unstoppable. It’s about playing the role to make it effective. So if we want to be this brave and confident version of ourselves, we need to adopt a bolder personality and can’t ignore me.
I found the advice motivating. Plus, I did it many years ago and it worked. At that time, I was a beginning teacher and was asked to work as a substitute instructor for a university professor who was teaching business English to business graduate students. I was horrified. You see, students were known for their unruly and cruel behavior. They even made a few of their teachers cry. One of them is one of my closest friends.
I had no choice but to change my personality and temperament to the extreme and adopt some strategies to create fear and respect. My mantra then was: I would rather be hated and respected than loved and disrespected. Being nice would make them swallow me whole. So, even though I was then just 21 years old, I managed to complete the course unscathed. These undisciplined students actually became the most disciplined students I have ever led. As I entered the classroom, I didn’t hear a single whisper. Oh…if only they knew how scared I am of them, they’d be in complete shock.
A radical change in personality, behavior controlled with near-perfect precision, and certain strategies helped me not only survive the challenge of managing boisterous and disruptive young people, but also thrive. That being said, there is a fine line between quiet confidence and a self-centered, responsible, go-getter attitude – something God avoids and hates.
“God resists the proud,
But give grace to the humble” James 4:6 NKJV.
So we might feel like we’re caught in a dilemma: how can we demonstrate confidence without slipping into arrogance? Or project confidence while remaining humble?
Especially when God requires us to be gentle like a lamb.
What is gentleness?
To be gentle is to forget oneself and to comply with the wishes of others,
submissive, accommodating, without the slightest trace of resistance. It’s living for others and not for yourself.
I know, this definition can be a recipe for abuse.
So, is this gentleness? Or is there something more than what meets the eye?
We’ve all been there, trying to tread lightly so as not to make waves – but if we read the Scriptures, we would realize that meekness is not total passivity. Yes, we are told to remain modest, to practice humility, because that is the mark of a faithful Christian. But insecurity and self-doubt have no place in our lives as servants of God. As believers, we must carry God’s torch boldly. But we must make sure that the brand of trust we exercise is rooted solely in Christ, because that is the only way we can find our voice without losing our heart.
Imitate the meekness and humility of Jesus
Jesus may have been described as someone who is as gentle as a lamb, but will emerge with the confidence of a lion when the situation calls for it. He never showed insecurity or doubted himself even once. He knows who He is. He took a stand for what he believed when the scribes and Pharisees engaged him in debate. He did not show passivity in the face of deceptive preaching or erroneous doctrine. He held on. Bold in defending the truth and in defending the name of God.
“For zeal for your house consumes me,
and the insults of those who insult you fall on Me. » Psalm 69:9 NIV
So… what does it really mean to be gentle?
Although gentleness is an admirable Christian trait, practicing gentleness without wisdom can also be a sure path to trouble. Being meek is not about catering to the sinful desires of others or pandering to their depraved opinions. It’s about practicing gentleness when the situation that requires it is consistent with God’s will.
The power to play the role
Having the kind of courage that comes from knowing who we are in Christ, we can be bold in the truth while still being gentle in spirit.
“Fear not, for I am with you;
Do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will support you with my right right hand. Isaiah 41:10 KJV
So be gentle as He has commanded you, but not so gentle that you allow people to put you down or step on your toes. Remember that the only time Jesus suffered much disrespect and abuse was when he was sentenced to be crucified. He must have been like a lamb to the slaughter. He was to fulfill the prophecy in Isaiah 53:7 NKJV:
“He was oppressed and afflicted,
Yet he did not open his mouth;
He was led like a lamb to the slaughter,
And as a sheep is silent before those who shear it,
That’s why he didn’t open his mouth.
We can be gentle while standing up for what is right. Jesus did it, as did the rest of his servants.
So live worthily, for you are God’s work, “made in fear and wonder.” Psalm 139:13-14 NIV
Because by playing this role, you, as a child of a powerful God, can thrive and conquer your fears while contributing to the expansion of the Father’s kingdom here on earth. Walk in the light of your identity in Christ, anchored in His authority, assume this role and live up to it.
“You have made them a little lower than the angels.
and crown them with glory and honor.
You made them rulers over the works of your hands
You put everything under their feet. Psalm 8:4-6 NIV
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Tamer Dagas
