Baked beans on a pizza? It's worse than pineapple!
Name: Baked Bean Pizzas.
Age: Recently revived.
Appearance: Circular misery.
There's nothing wrong with baked bean pizza. That would seem to be the case. Heinz has revived its long-dormant Beanz pizza, for the low price of just £3, from late November.
Why did they need to revive it? I don't know, maybe because putting baked beans on a pizza is a real affront to God.
Oh come on, the product makes sense. I know what you're going to say: a lot of people grate cheese over their beans on toast, and what's a baked bean pizza if not a classier version?
That's exactly what I was going to say. You are an idiot. Get out.
That sounds harsh. This is not the case. Have you ever had baked bean pizza? Have you ever been through the misery of cooking frozen baked beans and their accompanying sweet, sticky sauce on a gummy, flat base? Have you got? Because it's awful. Baked beans have no place on pizza.
Neither do pineapples. Well, I'm tired of this argument. Let's definitely clear one thing up, shall we? Go to any big pizza place in the world and you'll find pineapple on pizza. That's because customers are eating pineapple on the pizza in droves. Thousands and thousands are sold and consumed every day. The market has dictated that pineapple objectively belongs to pizza. You know what doesn't belong on pizza?
Please calm down. Baked beans have no place on pizza! That's probably why Heinz stopped selling baked bean pizza 19 years ago, because no one on Earth wanted to eat it.
So why the did they bring back? Because the world is on fire. Will that do?
Well, I like that. So buy a box of baked beans and a pizza and make them at home. It can be one of those little secrets that people have behind closed doors, like BDSM or voting Conservative. Don't force it on me when I'm shopping.
Are you also mad at other unconventional food mixes? What? Are there others?
Sure. You can now buy Kettle Peanut Butter and Kettle Chips. What's wrong with the world?
Now you can get Philadelphia that tastes like smoked salmon. You can? Delete everything I just said. Someone invented a fish and cheese pizza, stat.
Say, "Baked bean pizza came back from the dead."
Don't say, "If you buy one, you're dead to me."
Name: Baked Bean Pizzas.
Age: Recently revived.
Appearance: Circular misery.
There's nothing wrong with baked bean pizza. That would seem to be the case. Heinz has revived its long-dormant Beanz pizza, for the low price of just £3, from late November.
Why did they need to revive it? I don't know, maybe because putting baked beans on a pizza is a real affront to God.
Oh come on, the product makes sense. I know what you're going to say: a lot of people grate cheese over their beans on toast, and what's a baked bean pizza if not a classier version?
That's exactly what I was going to say. You are an idiot. Get out.
That sounds harsh. This is not the case. Have you ever had baked bean pizza? Have you ever been through the misery of cooking frozen baked beans and their accompanying sweet, sticky sauce on a gummy, flat base? Have you got? Because it's awful. Baked beans have no place on pizza.
Neither do pineapples. Well, I'm tired of this argument. Let's definitely clear one thing up, shall we? Go to any big pizza place in the world and you'll find pineapple on pizza. That's because customers are eating pineapple on the pizza in droves. Thousands and thousands are sold and consumed every day. The market has dictated that pineapple objectively belongs to pizza. You know what doesn't belong on pizza?
Please calm down. Baked beans have no place on pizza! That's probably why Heinz stopped selling baked bean pizza 19 years ago, because no one on Earth wanted to eat it.
So why the did they bring back? Because the world is on fire. Will that do?
Well, I like that. So buy a box of baked beans and a pizza and make them at home. It can be one of those little secrets that people have behind closed doors, like BDSM or voting Conservative. Don't force it on me when I'm shopping.
Are you also mad at other unconventional food mixes? What? Are there others?
Sure. You can now buy Kettle Peanut Butter and Kettle Chips. What's wrong with the world?
Now you can get Philadelphia that tastes like smoked salmon. You can? Delete everything I just said. Someone invented a fish and cheese pizza, stat.
Say, "Baked bean pizza came back from the dead."
Don't say, "If you buy one, you're dead to me."
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