Characteristics of intergenerational worship: dignified reciprocity

Dignified reciprocity in the context of worship

Many researchers and practitioners speak of intergenerationality as marked by mutuality (we all participate and benefit), equality (we are all valued equally), and reciprocity (we all give and receive). Chris Barnett, Emma Parr, and Melissa Neumann use these exact words in their free Intergenerational Worship Workbook: “Get involved together: more than worship, more than Sunday.” Similarly, Holly Catterton Allen and Jason Brian Santos write: “The terms reciprocity, mutualityaccommodation and equity has become normative both in terms of language and as general goals” for intergenerational ministry (“Inter Generational Ministry – A Forty-year Perspective,” 523).

As I sought to refine the list of potential “features” of intergenerational worship collected in the literature, Rev. Kelly Ryan was an invaluable conversation partner. She emphasized that reciprocity itself can be transactional. We may give and receive in ways that are neither mutually beneficial nor equitable. Kelly suggested adding dignity. In the context of intergenerational worship, we are all invited to give and receive in a manner respectful of the dignity of each worshiper.

Dignified reciprocity is two-way. Founded on the theology that we are all children of God, born worthy and gifted, it invites sharing between generations in all directions. When a generation shares a particular gift, the congregation engages that generation in the most dignified way possible. When a children’s choir performs an anthem, they don’t parade around to perform to entertain the adults; they are treated like cult leaders. They are invited to wear what adult choirs wear and stand where adult choirs stand and are thanked as worship leaders. Likewise, when elders share their wisdom, they are not seen as “out of touch,” but heard and appreciated as valued members of the community.

Dignified reciprocity in worship invites us to view others of all ages as having the right to be present, give, and receive during worship. It invites us to examine our practices to see where we might treat one generation or another inequitably and to look for ways to grant even more dignity to each body in worship.

Addressing generational power imbalances

A key aspect of dignified reciprocity is considering who in your community makes decisions about the design and implementation of age-appropriate worship. In an episcopal context, for example, you might consider:

• Who selects music for worship? What generation do they identify with? Do they collaborate with other generations in their selection process?
• Who coordinates the altar guild And floral arrangements? Which generation(s) do they identify with? Are the other members of these teams from the same generation(s) or from different generations? As leaders, do coordinators take a collaborative mentoring approach or a more authoritarian approach?
• Who makes decisions about worship space? Which generation(s) do they identify with? Do they seek feedback from other generations when changes are made to the space?
• Who coordinates liturgical leaders like readers, acolytes, ushers and reception agents? Which generation(s) do they identify with? Are the other members of these teams from the same generation(s) or from different generations? As leaders, do coordinators take a collaborative mentoring approach or a more authoritarian approach?
• Who decides how Psalm will be read, select the form to Prayers of the peopleand chooses a version of The Great Thanksgiving? Which generation(s) do they identify with? Do they seek input from other generations to make these decisions?

Addressing power imbalances between generations is a long-term and cultural change effort. A framework that might be interesting to consider is the Prosci ADKAR^® Model. This model of change has five elements: “awareness”, “desire”, “knowledge”, “capacity” and “reinforcement”. For liturgical decision-making power to be shared more equitably between generations, we must first become aware imbalances. It is then necessary to construct a desire for change. Third, we must consider what awareness or the education people need to make this type of change. Fourth, we must provide opportunities for skills development so that generations not currently in positions of power have the opportunity to ability to get into work. Finally, we must consider sustainability: how will the new way of designing and implementing worship be reinforced?

What I described above is a systematic, long-term, and comprehensive way to address power imbalances between generations. This may or may not be appropriate for your context. Below are smaller but powerful steps you can take to address power imbalances and increase dignified reciprocity.

Practical steps to increase dignified reciprocity

Each church context is unique and there is no single “right” way to practice intergenerational worship. The list of ideas below is not prescriptive (or exhaustive), but is intended to inspire your imagination to help worshipers connect more deeply as members of the body of Christ in a specific worship community.

• Listen to comments from all generations: In “The power of sacred listening“, Episode 33 of the TryTank podcast, guest Josh Packard describes how sacred listening is a transformative act for young people. Packard says, “When there is a power imbalance and the person who has more power takes the time to listen to the person who has less power. . . It is always a profound act of service. In the context of worship, we can seek out and truly listen to the thoughts and comments of all ages.
• Reconsider age-segregated leadership opportunities: In many contexts, the first liturgical leadership role that young people are invited to assume is that of acolyte. This is often the only role offered to primary and middle-aged youth, and no adults are part of the sidekick team. The sidekick is a wonderful opportunity for young people, but not all young people feel comfortable with “direct” roles. How might we get to know young people better individually and invite them to play roles that match their gifts and interests? What could be the benefits of diversifying all management teams so that children, young people and adults work side by side?
• Expand options for answering people’s prayers: In many contexts, the people’s prayers include an opportunity for personal intercession to be offered aloud or “in the silence of your heart.” Knowing that not everyone can articulate their prayers verbally, we can add opportunities for artistic or kinesthetic prayers. For example, a prayer garden could be set up with a basket of stones and a basket of flowers. Worshipers may be asked to place flowers in the garden as a sign of things that make them grateful or happy and to swing in the garden for things that are heavy, hard or sad. (Thanks to Rev. Miranda Hassett for sharing this practice!)
• Ask for consent for sharing stories: Whether we’re sharing with an individual over coffee or with the entire congregation during a sermon, it’s always appropriate to ask for consent to share another person’s story, even if we don’t use their name. This is especially true when there is a power imbalance, such as when an adult tells a child’s story.
• Embrace Equity for Choirs: If choirs are separated by age, consider how they can equitably share their gifts during worship. For example, all choirs could sing together every quarter. If a children’s choir sings alone, they may wear the same type of clothing as an adult choir and sing from the choir stalls rather than in front of the choir (which might convey the message they are performing rather than the message that they are leading worship).
• Reconsider a unique space for children: A singular “prayer ground” or “soft space” sends the message that children are welcome, but consider ways to offer young worshipers even more autonomy in choosing a place to sit. For example, you could provide a tool “library” to participate in worship that people of all ages can use and bring to the seat of their choice or to a few “soft spaces” instead of one. (Thanks to Rev. Sylvia Miller-Mutia for the idea of ​​many child-scale spaces. I highly recommend reading Sylvia’s explanation of the Website of Saint Gregory of Nyssa under #4.)
• Foster a culture of gratitude for all leaders: How adults respond to youth worship leadership is important. Instead of focusing on quality leaders (e.g., “You did such a good job!”), encourage adults to thank the youth for their presence and participation (e.g., “Thank you for helping lead worship today. I’m glad you’re here.”).
• Invite all ages to participate in biblical drama: Although Christmas pageantry and other forms of biblical drama can be a dynamic and powerful way to engage Scripture, they can also be instrumental to children and youth. As my colleague Jodi Belcher writes in our co-authored article “Christmas competition from two angles“, Christmas pageants “can undermine the Church’s efforts to affirm children and youth as full members of the body of Christ by expecting them to perform before an audience in a church service.” One way to prevent this instrumentalization is to invite people of all ages to participate in biblical dramas. You can also find more ideas in the article.

Do you have another idea for increasing dignified reciprocity in intergenerational worship? Let us know! Contact Sarah Bentley AllredProject Director, Roots & Wings: Intergenerational Training Collaboration.

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