3 Truths We Can Learn From Jacob and Rachel's Relationship

The relationship of Jacob and Rachel, although considered the most beautiful of biblical romances, has known many difficulties. Jacob labored seven years for Rachel's hand. At the end of the seven years, Jacob was ready to marry Rachel, but Rachel's father Laban tricked Jacob into giving him Leah (Rachel's sister) instead. This caused Jacob to work seven more years to marry Rachel. Rachel and Leah became Jacob's wives, but Jacob always preferred Rachel.

This Bible drama presents three truths we can learn from Jacob and Rachel's relationship:

1. Favoritism is bad

The Bible states that Jacob loved Rachel more than Leah: "his love for Rachel was greater than his love for Leah. And he labored another seven years for Laban" (Genesis 29:30b). Yet , the Bible directly tells us, “My brothers and sisters, believers in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ should not show favoritism” (James 2:1) Jacob showed favoritism in his relationship with Rachel, even though he is married to the two sisters.

God never wants us to show favoritism in any of our human relationships. Although polygamy is wrong, Jacob should not have shown favoritism between the two. Due to his blatant favoritism, we see bitterness rising in Leah's heart. Naturally, she begins to doubt her worth by living in Rachel's shadow.

In our own relationships, we should only have one partner and we should not show favoritism. Often in relationships, partners may compare their current partner to a former partner or even show favoritism towards a former partner over their current partner. God doesn't want us to do that. Instead of dividing our interests, we need to focus on one partner, the current partner, rather than comparing it to someone else.

Similarly, apart from romantic relationships, there should be no favoritism within the family. Unfortunately, many parents play favorites with their children, or children play favorites with their parents. Friends play favorites, teachers have their pets, and coaches have their number one Allstars. As Christians, we never need to play favorites or show favoritism. We must love everyone as Jesus said: “I give you a new commandment: Love one another. As I have loved you, you must love one another” (John 13:34).

2. Polygamy is bad

A second truth we can learn from Jacob and Rachel's relationship is that polygamy is wrong. As mentioned earlier in the first point, Jacob showed favoritism towards Rachel over Leah. If a person has more than one spouse, favoritism is inevitable. This is one of the many reasons why polygamy is bad. Jacob was married to both Leah and Rachel, but at the beginning of creation God designed marriage between a man and a woman (Genesis 2:24). Anything short of that is against God's purpose for marriage.

Polygamy leads to many problems in a relationship, as shown in Jacob's relationship with Rachel and Leah. As Christians, we should never condone polygamy. Just because it was in the Old Testament doesn't mean it's okay. God never tells us that polygamy is right. God specifically tells us that we should only have one husband or one wife. Polygamy has been accepted by many false belief systems, including the Church of Latter Day Saints, officially known as the Mormon Church, but it is not biblical, nor their other doctrines.

In our relationships, we must ensure that we have only one partner. We should not have multiple husbands or multiple wives. We need to focus on one partner, not multiple partners. Even in the case of a romantic relationship, a Christian should only date one person at a time. The purpose of dating is to see if the other person will be a potential person to marry. If a person is dating multiple people, it can lead to splits, confusion, and lack of fidelity. These concerns arose between Jacob and Rachel and only created tension and hostility.

3. Marriage should not be based on physical appearance

A third truth we can learn from Jacob and Rachel's relationship is that marriage shouldn't be based on looks. Rachel was very beautiful, and that made Jacob attracted to her. The Bible tells us, "Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel had a fine figure and was beautiful" (Genesis 29:17). Since Rachel was beautiful, Jacob loved her more than Leah. Despite Rachel's physical appearance, we are never told that she was a disciple of God. In fact, the Bible tells us that Rachel took with him one of the gods of her father's house...