How Simon Callow met Sebastian Fox: 'I thought, my God, he's very attractive from behind'
If their mutual friend had managed to set up Sebastian Fox before, he might never have introduced him - twice - to actor Simon Callow. At the beginning of 2012, Sebastian was at a Prokofiev concert given by the London Philharmonic Orchestra, of which Simon was the narrator. He had been invited by their friend Tim Walker, then the orchestra's general manager, who then took him backstage to meet Simon. "It was very rushed," Simon recalls. "It was really about a minute and a half."
But Walker persisted and took Sebastian to see Simon's one-man show, Being Shakespeare, a few weeks later. Then the three of them, accompanied by another friend, went to dinner. At dinner, Sebastian seemed calm and the conversation, says Simon, “was pretty general, between the four of us. It was very enjoyable, but it wasn't like we were particularly successful in engaging a lot. It was when they left, Sebastian walking deliberately ahead, that, Simon says, “I remember thinking, very vividly, how electric your energy was. I thought, god, he's very attractive from behind."
They exchanged numbers and Simon says he was hoping Sebastian would text (he didn't didn't do), but a few days later Sebastian sent a handwritten note to the door of the stage of the theater where Simon was performing, inviting him to dinner (it was at Caprice, one of London's favorite restaurants from Simon, he took it as a good sign.)
"I really enjoyed the evening", says Sebastian. "First of all seeing Simon on stage, c It was a very moving and uplifting performance. At dinner, I really enjoyed Si. He smiled at her. "I really liked your liveliness. The note was really just to say thank you and that it would be a pleasure to see you again." "
Simon was about to go to Chicago for several weeks for work, but they came back for a few days to keep their appointment. “It was definitely worth it because that dinner was wonderful,” says Simon. "We talked about what we wanted in relationships and we came up with the exact same idea, which was, in a nutshell, total commitment, an absolute sense of exploration within the relationship, rather than just sort of domestic or sexual encounter."< /p>
The next day Simon invited Sebastian to Chichester to see Uncle Vanya - Sebastian loved Chekhov's play, although some time later, he admitted that he thought Simon intended to introduce him to a relationship. They both laugh about it. "It obviously became a running joke in Simon's acting circles," Sebastian says. “I grew up with music, but not at all with theatre. When I met Simon, I had very little idea of his world. »
When they met, Sébastien was 29 and Simon was 63; Simon had been in the arts all his life and Sebastian was a management consultant. In four or five months, they got to know each other well. "When we finally went away together for a weekend for the first time, it was in Hay-on-Wye, where I was reading TS Eliot," says Simon. "So the culture has hovered over this relationship from the start." Sebastian admits it can sometimes be intimidating to meet Simon's friends, some of whom are very famous. "I'm suddenly being introduced to people I would only have known on screen," he says.
But their differences were a strength, says Simon. "One of the things I loved about Seb was that he loved his job, which is totally different from mine [Sebastian now works in tech]. Seb has masses of skills and analytical powers which I completely miss, and I have other attributes, which he lacks. Sebastian says it works, in part because "we don't want to be kindred spirits to each other". Everyone has their own interests." The defining aspect is that we live our lives on a solid and shared basis. That does not mean that we do not have common interests, because we do things together all the time, but we do not live not necessarily in each other's pockets. They are, says Simon, "drastically different from each other, in many ways, despite this crucial thing, which is that we have this tremendous sense of the meaning of commitment towards each other".
They say the age gap has never s been a problem for them. "I think you still have this stigma, in society, both around same-sex relationships and relationships between two people of different ages, where it's common for people to attribute motivations or stereotypes," Sebastian says. "For me, what was great was seeing the clichés crumble in the face of the real experience of meeting each other's friends."
They moved in together this August, earlier than expected, spurred on by Sebastian's need to move out of his apartment, but it felt right. ...
If their mutual friend had managed to set up Sebastian Fox before, he might never have introduced him - twice - to actor Simon Callow. At the beginning of 2012, Sebastian was at a Prokofiev concert given by the London Philharmonic Orchestra, of which Simon was the narrator. He had been invited by their friend Tim Walker, then the orchestra's general manager, who then took him backstage to meet Simon. "It was very rushed," Simon recalls. "It was really about a minute and a half."
But Walker persisted and took Sebastian to see Simon's one-man show, Being Shakespeare, a few weeks later. Then the three of them, accompanied by another friend, went to dinner. At dinner, Sebastian seemed calm and the conversation, says Simon, “was pretty general, between the four of us. It was very enjoyable, but it wasn't like we were particularly successful in engaging a lot. It was when they left, Sebastian walking deliberately ahead, that, Simon says, “I remember thinking, very vividly, how electric your energy was. I thought, god, he's very attractive from behind."
They exchanged numbers and Simon says he was hoping Sebastian would text (he didn't didn't do), but a few days later Sebastian sent a handwritten note to the door of the stage of the theater where Simon was performing, inviting him to dinner (it was at Caprice, one of London's favorite restaurants from Simon, he took it as a good sign.)
"I really enjoyed the evening", says Sebastian. "First of all seeing Simon on stage, c It was a very moving and uplifting performance. At dinner, I really enjoyed Si. He smiled at her. "I really liked your liveliness. The note was really just to say thank you and that it would be a pleasure to see you again." "
Simon was about to go to Chicago for several weeks for work, but they came back for a few days to keep their appointment. “It was definitely worth it because that dinner was wonderful,” says Simon. "We talked about what we wanted in relationships and we came up with the exact same idea, which was, in a nutshell, total commitment, an absolute sense of exploration within the relationship, rather than just sort of domestic or sexual encounter."< /p>
The next day Simon invited Sebastian to Chichester to see Uncle Vanya - Sebastian loved Chekhov's play, although some time later, he admitted that he thought Simon intended to introduce him to a relationship. They both laugh about it. "It obviously became a running joke in Simon's acting circles," Sebastian says. “I grew up with music, but not at all with theatre. When I met Simon, I had very little idea of his world. »
When they met, Sébastien was 29 and Simon was 63; Simon had been in the arts all his life and Sebastian was a management consultant. In four or five months, they got to know each other well. "When we finally went away together for a weekend for the first time, it was in Hay-on-Wye, where I was reading TS Eliot," says Simon. "So the culture has hovered over this relationship from the start." Sebastian admits it can sometimes be intimidating to meet Simon's friends, some of whom are very famous. "I'm suddenly being introduced to people I would only have known on screen," he says.
But their differences were a strength, says Simon. "One of the things I loved about Seb was that he loved his job, which is totally different from mine [Sebastian now works in tech]. Seb has masses of skills and analytical powers which I completely miss, and I have other attributes, which he lacks. Sebastian says it works, in part because "we don't want to be kindred spirits to each other". Everyone has their own interests." The defining aspect is that we live our lives on a solid and shared basis. That does not mean that we do not have common interests, because we do things together all the time, but we do not live not necessarily in each other's pockets. They are, says Simon, "drastically different from each other, in many ways, despite this crucial thing, which is that we have this tremendous sense of the meaning of commitment towards each other".
They say the age gap has never s been a problem for them. "I think you still have this stigma, in society, both around same-sex relationships and relationships between two people of different ages, where it's common for people to attribute motivations or stereotypes," Sebastian says. "For me, what was great was seeing the clichés crumble in the face of the real experience of meeting each other's friends."
They moved in together this August, earlier than expected, spurred on by Sebastian's need to move out of his apartment, but it felt right. ...
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