How to stop overthinking and calm your buzzing mind

The opinions expressed by entrepreneurs contributors are their own.

Imagine this: you're in the middle of one of your Monday morning anxiety spirals when one of your colleagues gives you this advice.

"Just think happy thoughts."

Not only is this not helpful, it has the opposite effect of what they intended, making you even more frustrated.

Why? Because, as authors and researchers Brock Bastian and Ashley Humphrey write for The Conversation, these kinds of suggestions are a form of "toxic positivity" - a way of asking us to think positively even when we live in a difficult situation. And let's face it, when we're mentally drained and overthinking, the last thing we need are words of comfort.

For example, suppose you have a family member at home who is sick and you have an early morning Zoom meeting after not sleeping for half the night. Thinking of "happy thoughts" will not be enough.

As someone who has been through many such episodes over the past 16 years of running my business, I'd like to give you some advice on ways to calm your mind, without the fluff.

Related: Overthinking Kills Your Productivity

That was one of the hardest things to come to terms with when I founded my startup, Jotform. I thought if I could imagine every scenario, I could magically find the right solutions. But there were so many variables that I had no control over – whether a customer had issues with our product or a team member suddenly quit during our busiest season. As Entrepreneur contributor Per Bylund explains, "We can't plan without mistakes, because we don't know anything about the future until it's already a reality."

Bylund adds, "It's the heaviest burden for , because their job is to create their version of the future and hope for the best. They endure uncertainty."

Of course, accepting what is beyond our control is easier said than done. Accepting that we have to be okay with the unknowable was probably one of the first lessons I learned all those years ago, and it's been a key pillar for me during this pandemic. p> Set a time limit for your overthinking

A coach once told me to set aside time each day for my worries.

"15 minutes or half an hour — in your car, on a walk, on a break — worry all you want," she said. "Get everything from your system into this space."

The main thing was to give me a designated time limit.

“Wait,” I hesitated. "Does this really work?"

To my surprise, after trying it for a week, it worked like a charm.

I'm not going to lie, at first it was hard. My brain was so used to ruminating at all hours of the day, but once I started practicing giving myself that time every day, it freed up energy to think about other things. /p>

For me, clearing my mind of worries involved practicing the Morning Pages each day - where I wrote down all my unfiltered emotions and thoughts. The goal is to do this without judgment, allowing your subconscious mind to let go of whatever is weighing you down.

Related: Escape Your Head: How Overthinking Is Harming Your Business

We are creatures of habit; we are wired to focus on the bad. For example, when you're in an endless cycle of rumination - even though you've had good times in your day - your mind keeps rehashing all your missteps or worrying about anything that could go wrong.

But this trend is not necessarily our fault. It's actually due to something psychologists call negativity bias. This means that we are more likely to focus on the negative, as this is how our mind and body alert us to danger.

According to Kenneth Yeager, director of the STAR (Stress, Trauma, and Resilience) program at Ohio State University...