"What kind of fruit are you?" How to Answer Five of the Worst Job Interview Questions

How do you think your life has gone for you so far?

Do not answer this question. It's not that I don't care. But Salem Pierce, a 30-year-old graphic designer from Ohio, actually asked himself this question during a job interview. Worse, the question prompted him to post a two to five minute video response.

This could be a new low in the almost always humiliating experience that is job interview. What other horrifying questions might you be asked in these death-or-glory settings, and how might you answer them? Try them on for size.

"If you were a fruit, what would you be?" funny and creative, “edgy” even. This kind of random questioning is of course challenging, meant to unsettle, and is designed to entertain interviewers rather than discover anything useful about the candidate. Take a deep (but silent) breath, smile gently, and say, "An apple".

"How would you react if you were sexually harassed by your boss?" one is inappropriate and in poor taste. Maybe the potential employer is an old-school lech who wants to know what he could do. You have to play this one by the book. Say, "I would of course immediately report it to my line manager and possibly HR. If the line manager is the predator, I would report the incident to their boss."

"What's the worst mistake you've ever made at work?" voyeurism (I guess it's a long day for them; they probably want to get some decent stories out of it, at least). But you have to play ball. It's worth having a few slightly embarrassing trivia, true or false, up your sleeve for times like this (see also: "What's the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you at work?"). So how about, "We had a big pitch to prepare and in my rush I thought I had to produce 100 copies instead of 10, so I stayed late and printed the 100 copies, got them bound and prepared them for the morning. What a waste of paper! etc etc, along with a few shrugs of regret. That should do the trick.

"You have a CV rather varied. Why have you never been able to stick to anything? Oh, thank you very much. It's OK for you, Mr. or Mrs. Steady Career Path. You might not have noticed what's going on here in the real world, but the job market has gotten pretty choppy lately. How to handle this? Respond calmly, “I am committed to learning new skills and having new experiences. I have high standards, and when I'm not learning anymore, I move on."

"What do you see yourself doing in five years?" Oh, come on. Are you still asking that one? I don't even know what I'm going to eat for dinner. Do you watch the news? Where will we all be tomorrow, in a week, next month? And you? want to know more about 2028? The best (and only) answer? "Well, hopefully I'll still be here doing a good job for you!"